Inside Red Dress

Don’t Shop Today


I know, that’s not what you would expect to hear from the owner of a large online retailer, but Red Dress Boutique isn’t just any retailer. So I’m asking something of you, consider it a favor; just hear me out—it’s that important to me.

Don’t shop today.

964552_703703706328776_1848257769_oSo many holidays are marketed as ‘occasions to spend with family’—to make memories, to enjoy time together, to be grateful—but out of the same mouth we hear the whispered temptations of, “Thanksgiving Sale,” and “50% Off,” or “Shop Today for Special Deals!” I look at the ads, the emails, the commercials, and wonder what other people think when they hear these conflicting messages. I’ve been on both sides of the fence, and because I’ve irreparably lost something that you may still have, I need to say this before it’s too late for you.

Don’t shop today. Please. Not one sale. We’re a family company, through and through. And while we love each other as we are now, there’s a distinct absence this morning. I feel it in the air, in my bones, in my heart. And I promise that if you don’t take time right now to hug and pay attention to those loved ones, you may not get the chance to next year. I’m not trying to be morbid, just blunt, because it’s that dire a message. I wish I could take every one of you by the shoulders, and shake you, tell you to wake up and enjoy these moments while they’re here because you’re on a ticking clock and likely don’t realize it.

Don’t shop today.

280491_651922690046_1216930_oWhile your dad is hovering in the kitchen, poking and prodding the turkey and grumbling about how ravenous he is, go join him. Steal bits of food and revel in those pilfered bites, with your partner in crime, like they’re the best bites you’ve ever taken. They might very well be.

Don’t shop today.

Screen Shot 2014-11-27 at 11.12.24 AM.pngSit with your grandmother and look her into the eyes and really, truly listen as she talks about the way things used to be. Take a moment to appreciate the vast quantities of cookies, pies and cakes that materialized from that wonderful woman’s arms—smell them, taste them, remember what they looked like. They’re beautiful, so is she, and this could be your last opportunity to actually thank her, through your attention to her, for all of her efforts. She has incredible things to tell you, if you’ll just put your phone down and hear them.

Don’t shop today.

Help your mom in the kitchen as she cooks enough food for an army of fifty, slaving away like it’s the last meal any of you will ever eat. Maybe somewhere deep down all mothers know how little time we have on this earth. Perhaps that’s where part of this message is stemming from. Not just the things I have lost, but my son … the brave, precocious little thing who, even as I type this, is dragging out all of his toys so they can have Thanksgiving with us. New souls, and old souls seem to have that in common—the keen understanding of what matters and what doesn’t. Granted, for my five year old, it’s not all the time (try telling him he can’t have cookies after dinner, and my theory is instantly debunked). But every now and then, during moments like this one, he has that sense of knowing … that deep understanding of how absurd it is to do anything 76618_167301916635627_4836666_nother than pay attention to those who are right in front of you.

Don’t shop today.

Help your little one do whatever it is they’re doing that is the most important thing in the world to them right now. Doesn’t matter what it is, or what it’s taking the place of. Your hair can go uncurled, your outfit doesn’t have to be perfect. Again, not what you’d expect from a women’s clothing boutique. But guess what? If I don’t tell you, who will? Who is going to beg you to enjoy this day for the unbelievable blessing that it is? Why am I? Because my daddy, and my grandmother aren’t here anymore. The poking and prodding is left to friends or other family members, the grumbling about the good old days is left to me, and there’s that absence that I mentioned earlier. Because although I have never shopped on Thanksgiving day, I’ve always treasured it for the miracle that it is. And now, that miracle 325385_258034154229069_7009611_o-2is a little different, and I’m compelled to plead my case for your sake, and hope it’s well received.

So don’t shop today.

And take a lesson from me. Spend today being thankful. Spend TOMORROW shopping.

Love, Diana (Mrs. Red Dress Boutique)

Comments

  1. Marion Dillard
    January 5, 2016 at 12:58 am (1 year ago)

    My son works for you. As a business woman myself I am impressed with your company and your attitude. It will make you more successful than one day of shoppers could. We lost 5 close family members in the last year. My son and our family know the sting of that loss and cherish the memories we made in years gone by and will make this year. Thank you for valuing the people who work at Red Dress.

  2. Dana
    December 30, 2015 at 6:14 am (1 year ago)

    I lost my mother 10 days before Christmas when I was 12 years old. People do under estimate how fast time goes and we’re not guaranteed tomorrow. I hate all the ads nowadays because like you I’ve never shopped on a holiday and still wish for more time.

  3. Tracy
    November 27, 2015 at 2:23 am (2 years ago)

    Thank you for you thoughtful words. Happy Thanksgiving.

  4. Gija
    November 26, 2015 at 3:57 pm (2 years ago)

    I agree with you too. I too lost much Mother whom was the rock of our family as well as my Grandmother’s. So I know it is about memories that’s all we really leave behind that’s important and cherish. Thanks for taking the time to post this , Gina.

  5. Linda
    November 26, 2015 at 2:46 pm (2 years ago)

    I’m a total mess after reading your post, and so grateful you wrote it, thank you for speaking from the heart and sharing, it resonates so much. I love your company and yet haven’t purchased anything yet, not because I don’t want to (I have so much clothing to donate first). I watched you and your company grow from Shark Tank and have been a fan ever since. I saw your email and thought, wow, you have a lot to be grateful for which wonderful, everything you do and write expresses your gratitude, but today, writing, “Please don’t shop today!” And you are in ONLINE Retail, is HUGE. and explaining why and breaking it down! It is a mental conflict and I’m like, enough already! Let’s take back Thanksgiving. Stores as REI and TJ Maxx Companies and PC Richard and Son are doing this and many need to also. Let the employees be with their families. I shopped the first Midnight Madness in 2006 with friends, (and that was after Thanksgiving, not on the day like stores are doing today!) shopped till we dropped, but never again. Growing up was never like this. Family came first. And you aren’t being morbid considering the recent events in our World today. My heart thinks of the security guard who lost his life doing his job because of greedy people who had to get a sale and lack of adequate protection. I pray for his family. I was in Maryland visiting family and this happened here in NY where I live. It happened so many years ago, and it’s so sad. It is not worth it. Shopping can wait until tomorrow as you eloquently stated. I posted your blog on my Twitter and FB and Pinerest, and encourage others to do the same. I plan to spend it in gratitude for my life and my blessings and with my boyfriend and family and connecting with my loved ones. Also I’m grateful for our troops that can’t be with their families and thanking them for protecting our Country. THANK YOU DIANA for taking the stand and reminding us of what’s most important. Thank you for sharing your family and memories with us. God has blessed you richly and I pray He will continue to always, and many more doors opening for you. I love you! God bless, and Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving! Love, Linda ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤.

  6. Lakynn
    November 26, 2015 at 1:40 pm (2 years ago)

    This is such a great message, thank you ❤️ Happy Thanksgiving!

  7. Jennifer
    November 26, 2015 at 12:50 am (2 years ago)

    I love shopping at RDB for a few reasons, obviously the clothes, and the personalize notes in my package when it arrives, but this blog just did it for me. I will continue to support and purchase from RDB as much as I can (except for tomorrow ). Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

  8. Mandie
    November 28, 2014 at 2:47 am (3 years ago)

    Well said!! That was just beautiful! And so true!! Thank you so much!

  9. Sami
    November 27, 2014 at 11:53 pm (3 years ago)

    Thank u for that beautiful message. It is so true that people forget then true waning of thanksgiving ( and Christmas) I will ded wait till tomorrow to start shopping I hope u and your family have a aerse thanksgiving! Also love love your store and site!

  10. Shirley
    November 27, 2014 at 11:17 pm (3 years ago)

    I loved your business before…totally love and respect you beyond words. Your words…values…heart…speak volumes to the integrity of who you are. From Canada…Happy Thanksgiving. Thanks for being more than just about making money. Thanks for being there for the heart and soul of the family. xxxx <3 ~

  11. Deanna
    November 27, 2014 at 11:04 pm (3 years ago)

    Amen ! You are so right ! What a brave thing to write, since your business is retail. I’m so impressed

  12. Deanna
    November 27, 2014 at 11:04 pm (3 years ago)

    Amen ! You are so right ! What a brave thing to write, since your business is retail. I’m so impressed

  13. Brittany Powers
    November 27, 2014 at 10:35 pm (3 years ago)

    Thank you for your heart felt message today. I believe it’s what so many of us need to hear. We need to be reminded of what Thanksgiving is all about. As i sat around the table with some of family, I realized things are not the same as when I was a little girl. People are no longer with us, others have family of their own and we are all scattered. It’s almost impossible to get all of together but I have so many memories from my childhood. Today, I reminisced about the good ole’ days coming to Grandma’s house in Athens, GA. Now that I am older, I truly cherish every moment I have with my family. I never know when I will get to see them next(especially since I live in CA now).

    Thank you for speaking from your heart and personal experience. Diana, thank you for staying true to yourself!

    Happy Thanksgiving!

    God Bless,
    Brittany

    • Linda
      November 26, 2015 at 2:53 pm (2 years ago)

      Your words are beautiful also, I agree. Happy Thanksgiving.

  14. Jamie
    November 27, 2014 at 10:22 pm (3 years ago)

    Your message was so sweet. It is wonderful how you want to be with your family and ask others to do the same.
    It’s just what I am doing.
    Hope your holiday is great.

  15. Maria
    November 27, 2014 at 10:19 pm (3 years ago)

    This is the true meaning of Thanksgiving. Being a small business owner it goes through your head so many times do I make the $$ or spend time with my family. I’ve followed your boutique for the last year and been very impressed. If we as individuals would learn the true meaning of the holidays then it would make each of us a better person. There is nothing more important than Family no matter if you get alone with them or not. I wish you and your family a blessed holiday.

  16. Laurie Lusk
    November 27, 2014 at 9:24 pm (3 years ago)

    How wonderful this was to read. It’s a very emotional subject and I too am missing my grandmother and my father and it hurts. I am trudging along. Things do feel emptier and without as much meaning. I want the good family feeling back.
    Thank you for the wonderful reminder. ❤️

  17. Brittany
    November 27, 2014 at 9:11 pm (3 years ago)

    I cried reading this. I lost my dad two years ago and my family is naturally extremely small. After dad passed I realized my family is EVERYTHING to me. I realized that if I don’t have children, my family could die out – that’s how small it is. My husband’s family is huge, and he doesn’t realize what he has. He is like a teenager who wants to leave family events as soon as possible, and it really breaks my heart. But he loves seeing my family (which consists of two people). It kills me seeing the disrespect and flippant attitude… But he has his reasons he says. I had reasons when I was younger, for acting like an arse. But he should know better by now.
    I am so thankful for the ones I have, and his family. But his attitude ruins it for me. 🙁

  18. Laurie
    November 27, 2014 at 9:09 pm (3 years ago)

    AMEN

  19. Michelle
    November 27, 2014 at 8:10 pm (3 years ago)

    This is one of the main reasons why I LOVE Red Dress Boutique so much!!! God bless you and your family! Happy Thanksgiving

  20. Kim
    November 27, 2014 at 7:25 pm (3 years ago)

    Thank-you for having the courage to be different, the strength to see it through and the love to pass it along to others

  21. Marcella
    November 27, 2014 at 7:18 pm (3 years ago)

    Thank you for putting this out there so eloquently! I really wish all the other retailers would follow in your footsteps as well. For this reason I will continue to support the Red Dress,

  22. Melissa
    November 27, 2014 at 6:51 pm (3 years ago)

    How amazing it is to hear someone say these things! I couldn’t agree more! Thank you for understanding what Thanksgiving is really about !

  23. Katie
    November 27, 2014 at 6:42 pm (3 years ago)

    Thank you! Thank you for saying what so desperately needs to be said. Stores are opening earlier and earlier….people are actually changing dinner times/traditions so accommodate the new shopping hours….nothing you can purchase is that important. I am far away from my family yet am so blessed to have my children and wonderful friends t my table today…creating new memories and sharing old. Enjoy your little one! They grow up too fast…and have a wonderful Thanksgiving!!!

  24. Greg
    November 27, 2014 at 6:28 pm (3 years ago)

    Very well said and faithfully heard. I was surprised at a conversation we had at the dinner table the other night. My child’s class did a study and she was in the minority of the children to eat at the table with their parents. I am thankful for the memories and moments we have every day!

  25. Greg
    November 27, 2014 at 6:18 pm (3 years ago)

    Very well said and faithfully heard. I would like to add how surprised I was at a conversation we had at the dinner table the other day. My child’s class did a study and we learned that she was in the minority of kids that eat together at the table with their parents. I’m thankful for those moments and memories we have every day!

  26. Kaeleigh
    November 27, 2014 at 6:01 pm (3 years ago)

    Love the message behind this. Sitting here now, tearing up, I can recall the years of memories when the holidays were sacred and were meant for family to open its doors and establishments to close theirs. Thank you for keeping a family tradition alive.

  27. Lalonie
    November 27, 2014 at 5:57 pm (3 years ago)

    Very impressed and touched by this post. I am proud of you for taking the time to write this message! If consumers wouldn’t shop today at all, more people could enjoy one day with their family!!!

  28. Lisa Ann
    November 27, 2014 at 5:53 pm (3 years ago)

    Great message. I never shop on Thanksgiving…never have, and never will. Enjoy your blessings. XOXOX

  29. Angela
    November 27, 2014 at 5:49 pm (3 years ago)

    I love this!!!

  30. Angela
    November 27, 2014 at 5:49 pm (3 years ago)

    I love this!!! B

  31. Erika
    November 27, 2014 at 5:33 pm (3 years ago)

    Wow. I am a mess reading this, it is so touching. I absolutely love it and wish there were more people out there who think the same. God bless you!

  32. Penny
    November 27, 2014 at 5:28 pm (3 years ago)

    I am so emotional reading this as I have lost my daddy and grandmother this year. If only to have another Thanksgiving and Christmas with them. Thank you.

  33. Erika
    November 27, 2014 at 5:25 pm (3 years ago)

    I will not be able to shop today or tomorrow… I had surgery on Tuesday… So I am home bound for about 4 weeks!

  34. Samantha
    November 27, 2014 at 5:12 pm (3 years ago)

    Absolutely beautiful message! I wasn’t planning on shopping today anyway, but this validates that even more so! Happy Thanksgiving to you & your family! Xo

  35. Sarah
    November 27, 2014 at 5:10 pm (3 years ago)

    I absolutely love your boutique and admire how hard you work at keeping it the best!!
    I’m learning from you and NOT working in my own business today or shopping.

    Happy Thanksgiving ♡

  36. Kristen
    November 27, 2014 at 5:10 pm (3 years ago)

    Your dad is so proud of you!

  37. Carla
    November 27, 2014 at 5:10 pm (3 years ago)

    Tearing up! Just beautiful. I tweeted it. This is how I live my life (because I experienced the same thing as you did), but I see so many others that don’t.
    I love your clothes and will continue to support your wonderful company (but not on holidays).

  38. GE
    November 27, 2014 at 5:10 pm (3 years ago)

    Says it all. Blessings to your family and to your business for your stand! Amen.

  39. GE
    November 27, 2014 at 5:08 pm (3 years ago)

    Says it all. Amen.

  40. Jill
    November 27, 2014 at 5:06 pm (3 years ago)

    I like the rest of these comments want to Thank You! Family is so important and I will not be shopping today. That is so hard for me to say because I love to shop but love my family a lot more…
    I also will not go and do the crazy shopping tomorrow I will spend it again with the family.. Sales can wait!! It is a lot safer to stay home there are some crazy people out there..
    Happy Thanksgiving!!

  41. Jess
    November 27, 2014 at 5:04 pm (3 years ago)

    Wow this is incredibly touching and sweet. I hope you have a great Thanksgiving!

  42. Sheila Bendall
    November 27, 2014 at 4:59 pm (3 years ago)

    I am a mess after reading this. Thank you.

  43. Erin
    November 27, 2014 at 4:56 pm (3 years ago)

    I have so much respect for you and your family. Thank you for putting family first in this world. Enjoy your work-free day, you deserve it! Happy Thanksgiving 🙂

  44. Aimee
    November 27, 2014 at 4:54 pm (3 years ago)

    Thank you. I love that message. And I love your boutique! Have a joyful day with those you love:)

    • Meinda
      November 28, 2014 at 12:35 am (3 years ago)

      I agree with you completely. Thanksgiving is a day to spend with family – listening, talking and loving one’s company. The time we spend with family is precious and should never be taken for granted. Our family along with a couple of my daughters friends who needed “a family” spent today together just talking, eating and having a quiet time. It was truly a day for giving thanks!!